Universal Spit-In-Your-Face Studios

This past week, I won tickets from a local radio station (KROQ) to go to Universal Studios.  They had a special event, where you got to enter the park before it opened, & go on the new "The Simpsons Ride."  This meant, we had to there between 7-8am Friday morning.  Which in turn meant, getting up at the really damn early.  But it was worth it.  "The Simpsons Ride" is whole lotta fun.  Even the line itself had things to keep you entertained.  They showed Simpsons cartoons, spoof-posters of other attractions in "Krustyland" and video vignettes of characters running different kiosks in the park.  The ride is of the simulation style.  The car doesn't go anywhere, but moves on hydraulics to give you the sensation of movement.  It's a far improvement over the "Back To The Future" ride it replaced.  A much more immersive experience.  But, maybe a little too immersive at parts...

This leads me to the title of this post.  After enjoying "The Simpsons Ride," we were allowed to stay in the park, & enjoy the rest of the day.  We took in a few more of the attractions at the park, which lead me to the following conclusion.  Every ride at Universal Studios has the central design of spitting water in your face.  We only went through a total of 4 attractions.  We got spit in the face 8 times!!  10 times, if you count the fact that we went on Simpsons twice.  It happens twice on Simpsons, once on "The Mummy" coaster & four(!) times in "Shrek 4-D."  Even on the Studio Tour, they have "Jurassic Park" dinosaurs that aim a water stream at your face.  What the hell is that all about!?!  Do they purposely sit down at the designing table & ask the following question?  "Yeah Bob, we really like the design for the new "Meet The Fockers" dog in the toilet special effects simulator attraction.  But, can we make the toilet spit in the audience's face?"